In the destructive wake of yet another big hurricane, the nation mourns. But we need action. Where's Donald Rumsfeld's evil destructive warmongering genius when you need it?

I examined the rumors, and found that the source of the hurricanes is Las Canarias, a chain of islands located off the coast of Morroco. That's in western Africa, for those non-geographically inclined readers. So now we have a place to bomb. I suggest to all you voting Americans that you get on a letter write now, haha. Get it, write now.

If you have any doubts, don't worry. I just came from Las Canarias, and the people there are a bunch of losers. They speak Spanish even though they are not Spaniards, geographically. How about claim your own language? What a loss.

Here's a picture of the source of the evil hurricanes. It looks benign, but, trust me, bombs should fall.